Illinois Bets Big on Bitcoin: “HODL for 5 Years or Bust!”

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🎭 Hold onto your hats, folks! The Bitcoin 🪙 reserve circus has officially begun, and Illinois is jumping into the ring with a plan so bold, it’ll make your grandma’s savings bonds look like Monopoly money. Just a day after Utah whispered sweet nothings about BTC reserves, Illinois is like, “Hold my deep-dish pizza,” and drops House Bill 1844 (HB1844). 💼

State Representative John Cabello, probably wearing a cape, introduced this bill to create a “special fund” for Bitcoin. Because, you know, regular funds are just too mainstream. 🕶️ The plan? Hold onto that sweet, sweet BTC for at least five years. That’s right, Illinois is playing the long game. 🕰️

“The State Treasurer shall hold all Bitcoin deposited into the Fund for a duration of at least 5 years from the date that the Bitcoin enters the State’s custody.”

Translation: “We’re not selling until we’re rich or broke. No in-between.” 💸 After five years, they can sell, trade, or even convert it to Dogecoin if they’re feeling spicy. 🌶️

The bill is now chilling in the Rules Committee, probably sipping coffee and waiting for lawmakers to stop arguing about who gets the last donut. 🍩 Meanwhile, Arizona’s like, “We’re doing it too!” because nothing says “financial innovation” like a good ol’ Bitcoin arms race. 🏁

Bitcoin: The New Political Football 🏈

Since Trump’s victory, the crypto world has been buzzing like a bee in a soda can. 🐝 Analysts are predicting a crypto-friendly policy shift, and Trump wasted no time signing an executive order for a digital asset stockpile. But wait, there’s drama! The XRP vs. Bitcoin feud is heating up, with rumors that Ripple is cozying up to White House lawmakers. 🍿

And it’s not just the U.S. The Czech National Bank governor, Aleš Michl, is like, “Let’s throw 5% of our 140 billion euro reserves into Bitcoin!” Because why not? 🌍

Wyoming Senator Cynthia Lummis is also in the mix, pushing for a 200,000 BTC stash over five years. Her logic? “Bitcoin goes up, the dollar goes down. Let’s make America rich again!” 🇺🇸

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2025-01-30 16:41