Is George A. Romero’s ‘There’s Always Vanilla’ His Worst Movie Ever?

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#13 in my ranking of George A. Romero’s filmography.

It’s clear that Romero possesses a rich talent beyond just the narrow setting of a solitary farmhouse in rural Pennsylvania. However, his performance seems heavily dependent on having a script to work with effectively. The story by Rudolph Ricci revolves around the younger generation yearning for more and the concept of settling (the title refers to a line from late in the film), but the characters are underdeveloped, the narrative wanders aimlessly for extended periods, and the conclusion doesn’t seem well-supported by what precedes it. The acting isn’t stellar, but Romero’s cinematography occasionally offers intriguing compositions while the finale’s attempt to tie everything together (what little there is) feels authentic, if hollow.

Chris (Raymond Laine), a wandering soul, finds himself in Pittsburgh, close to his parents’ home, with no particular purpose. He unexpectedly reconnects with an old flame, Terri (Johanna Lawrence), at a strip club. Terri hints that her child could be Chris’s. Accompanying him is his father, Roger (Roger McGovern). Simultaneously, the story presents Lynn (Judith Streiner), a model and local commercial star, navigating the aftermath of a broken relationship. The movie initially separates these characters, but their unique personalities suggest a potentially engaging narrative direction.

In a quirky encounter at a bus station, she unintentionally knocks him over with a turnstile. She brings him home, and they have sex without protection. He eventually decides to move in, and for a while, they aimlessly wander about. The topic of potential pregnancy arises, and he becomes determined to write a book. The story drifts aimlessly for some time. A significant quote comes when Chris explains the purpose of his book: it encompasses everything and nothing. Essentially, this description offers a fair summary of the film. After an initial scene that demonstrated promise and talent, the plot seemed to devolve into the chaos of portraying “real” life.

As a movie critic, I must admit that this production left me feeling rather disillusioned, a stark contrast to the high standards I’ve come to expect from Romero himself. He openly expressed his dissatisfaction, attributing much of the film’s shortcomings to the premature departure of writer Ricci, who abandoned the project midway through, denying them the chance for revisions. It comes as no surprise that large portions of this movie appear to have been improvised, given its disjointed and aimless feel.

In the 70s, Chris eventually chose to secure employment, leveraging Lynn’s father’s name as a reference (it seems references weren’t thoroughly checked back then). He landed a job as a copywriter for an advertising firm, but only lasted a day before resigning due to the mundaneness and feeling of being constrained. Despite being tied down with Lynn for three months at that point, he couldn’t handle it. This situation was causing tension for Lynn, who felt his stresses mounting upon her. In response, she decided to participate in a clandestine medical procedure, one that could only be performed through underground channels.

Romero found himself with limited creative space to work visually (his focus was more on editing rather than extreme compositions), suggesting a more intricate and extensive project compared to Night of the Living Dead. This production, utilizing numerous locations, likely required greater ambition, which paired with the need to save on film and time, probably left him with less room for experimentation. He had to work effectively to make the most of his resources. The result was a visually pleasing film that allowed for longer takes in some dialogues. Managing the budget-friendly production effectively was impressive, although the script itself may have been too weak to sustain much intrigue.

In this scene towards the finale, Romero’s skill truly stands out. A sequence of Chris remaining in the apartment and Lynn undergoing a procedure is presented in a suspenseful manner that’s somewhat unexpected. Despite the fact that the characters are not particularly well-developed, it’s still engaging content.

Essentially, the film isn’t great. It’s quite mediocre, with most actors struggling to find their footing due to lack of direction from Romero. However, the opening scene is well-executed, and Romero shows some skill towards the end. Despite its flaws, it’s not a complete disaster. There are a few bright spots here and there, but overall, it’s more forgettable than bad.

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2025-02-23 00:30